Life changes, in the blink of an eye

Today's Blogtember topic is, Describe a distinct moment when your life took a turn.

Originally I thought I'd make this post about the decision to take my Masters (as that one choice is really the reason I'm working in fashion retail, which is something I'd always wanted to be able to do) but when I really started to think about it there is another more important thing that I've done that caused my life to change for the better.

In 2010 I was starting to feel myself again. I'd lost three stone, had embarked on my Masters course and was really enjoying life, when my cousin and her now husband Rob invited me to go on a group holiday with them and some friends to France.

Now, on New Year that year I'd said to myself that for my resolution I would start to take more risks, embark on new challenges and just generally that if something scared me, I should do it anyway. It was that resolution that encouraged me to say yes to the holiday, when in previous years I would probably have said no.

This was a holiday that would involve extreme heat (not my fave), swimwear (a daunting prospect) and scariest of all, boys. But in the spirit of my resolution I bit the bullet, booked a flight and began contemplating possible swimming costume cover ups.

I'd split up with my last boyfriend seven years earlier and since then had spent precious little time in the company of the opposite sex, let alone contemplated meeting someone new. So the thought of spending seven days in close proximity to two of Becki and Rob's male friends that I'd never met before filled me with dread.

The day of the holiday dawned and I was still feeling anxious but I needn't have worried and we set off for the Loire Valley in good spirits looking forward to a week of relaxation, laughter, good food and fine wine with new friends.

The first night was just Becki and Rob, me and their friend Mike, who I'd never met before. He immediately put me at ease and made me laugh as we sat outside talking on that first evening, and I can't really explain it but I already felt a spark of something special.

It's now three years later, we live together in our beautiful home in Fulham, we love each others families as if they were our own and are actively planning and saving for our future together, and this has all happened because I took a leap of faith and pushed myself out of my comfort zone.

 This post is part of Blogtember, the brainchild of Jenni over at Story of My Life.

All about me, a test of personality

Today's Blogtember topic has two parts. 

First we were to take this short personality test and then to respond to the results. 

The Humanmetrics Jung Typology Test has more than 70 questions on a variety of topics which are meant to determine what type of personality I have and what career I'm suited to. 

Now, I'm not going to lie, I wasn't exactly looking forward to this topic as I usually find these tests boring and not particularly accurate, but this one seemed different and in the spirit of Blogtember I decided to give it a go.

Apparently, I'm an ISFJ type, which means I'm 11% introvert, 1% sensing, 38% feeling and 44% judging, or Introverted Sensing and Extraverted Feeling, which to begin, with didn't mean much to me. Until I read this that is...

ISFJs live in a world that is concrete and kind. They are truly warm and kind-hearted, and want to believe the best of people. They value harmony and cooperation, and are likely to be very sensitive to other people's feelings. People value the ISFJ for their consideration and awareness, and their ability to bring out the best in others by their firm desire to believe the best. 

ISFJs have a rich inner world that is not usually obvious to observers. 

This statement alone is so true to my life. I'm more than happy to spend time on my own and it takes me a while to feel comfortable around people. I tend to observe from a distance and always try to see the best in people, even if I don't know them.

The ISFJ has an extremely well-developed sense of space, function, and aesthetic appeal. For that reason, they're likely to have beautifully furnished, functional homes. They make extremely good interior decorators. This special ability, combined with their sensitivity to other's feelings and desires, makes them very likely to be great gift-givers - finding the right gift which will be truly appreciated by the recipient. 

Yes. Buying gifts is literally my favourite type of shopping. Except that is when The Boy takes me on my fifth trip round Westfield to look for Christmas presents for his family and friends, and then ends up buying the items I pointed out in the first place.

ISFJs are extremely aware of their own internal feelings, as well as other people's feelings. They do not usually express their own feelings, keeping things inside. If they are negative feelings, they may build up inside the ISFJ until they turn into firm judgments against individuals which are difficult to unseed, once set. 

Oh. My.God.
This is me in so many ways.

The ISFJ feels a strong sense of responsibility and duty. They take their responsibilities very seriously, and can be counted on to follow through. For this reason, people naturally tend to rely on them. The ISFJ has a difficult time saying "no" when asked to do something, and may become over-burdened. In such cases, the ISFJ does not usually express their difficulties to others, because they intensely dislike conflict, and because they tend to place other people's needs over their own.

ISFJs need positive feedback from others. In the absence of positive feedback, or in the face of criticism, the ISFJ gets discouraged, and may even become depressed. When down on themselves or under great stress, the ISFJ begins to imagine all of the things that might go critically wrong in their life. They have strong feelings of inadequacy, and become convinced that "everything is all wrong", or "I can't do anything right". 

The Boy would agree with the above statement wholeheartedly. I do on occasion tend to be hard on myself and think the worst, which I'm trying to stop and to start valuing myself a little more. If only just to be able to leave the house on time, and without having to change my outfit a million times.

The ISFJ is warm, generous, and dependable. They have many special gifts to offer, in their sensitivity to others, and their strong ability to keep things running smoothly. They need to remember to not be overly critical of themselves, and to give themselves some of the warmth and love which they freely dispense to others. 

Source: http://www.personalitypage.com/ISFJ.html

It's amazing how a series of questions and answers can determine so much about me and my inner thoughts and feelings. 

Spooky almost.

This post is part of Blogtember, the brainchild of Jenni over at Story of My Life.

At first I was afraid...

Today's Blogtember topic is: A story about a time you were very afraid and there really is only one tale to tell.

Back in 2005, in what seems like another lifetime, I went travelling.

A trip across the US of A with a friend, taking in major cities and hidden gems across the country was the kind of adventure I'd always dreamed of, without the issue of a language barrier. 

Having started off in LA, taking in San Francisco, San Diego, Las Vegas, Dallas, and San Antonio we found ourselves in New Orleans, home of jazz music, voodoo, mardi gras and American style merriment.
 

We stayed for a few days, keen to take in all the city had to offer, touring the French Quarter, the amazing cemeteries, visiting a voodoo priestess and listening to jazz on Bourbon Street. 

 

The city was baking hot and we retired to our hotel at the end of each day exhausted and content, unaware that out in the bay of Mexico, trouble was brewing.

We knew that Hurricane Katrina had recently hit Florida, along with a number of other storms which had battered the coastline, but as far as we knew Katrina was losing strength and blowing away far out at sea. We certainly didn't think it was heading our way.

We spent Friday night on Bourbon Street, chatting to locals and tourists, drinking, dancing and just generally having a good time before falling into bed late, looking forward to a Saturday morning lie in.

Waking up mid morning, we lounged around in our room before Gemma ventured downstairs to use the phone. On her return she mentioned that a lot of people seemed to be checking out and thinking no more of it we turned on the television.

That's when things took a turn.

Every channel was broadcasting the town mayor at a press conference with members of the army telling everyone to leave the city as fast as they could. Not even to wait and pack their bags to just drop everything and go.

As two British girls travelling across the country by bus this was easier said than done.

Gemma rushed around trying to hire a car for us, whilst I threw our clothes into any available bag before we hurried down to check out. Pretty much all the guests had already left, only the staff and a few people who were unconcerned about the impending storm remained as we headed out the door and jumped into one of the only remaining cabs in the city.

We'd managed to track down a car at a hire place near the airport and as we crossed town to get there, winding through the backstreets, we could clearly see the local residents preparing for what was to come. It was a strange experience, knowing that some of these people had no option but to stay.

The queue at the hire car company was huge with people desperate to leave and we were lucky to have called ahead and reserved the car that was to become our salvation.

We joined the scores of people in the many traffic jams heading out of the city, both pretty freaked out having not driven a car abroad before, and using a map of the entire country to try and figure out which way to go.

We headed in the direction of Nashville, driving through the night down the wrong side of the highway after they changed direction of the incoming side to help with the evacuation. We drove along, mostly in silence, stunned by what had happened but grateful to be able to leave.

We pulled into a motel on the outskirts of Nashville at around 5am, ate breakfast, called our parents and collapsed into bed. Exhausted from the shock of having to leave New Orleans in such a sad way.

Turning on the news over the following days and seeing the devastation that Katrina brought to the city was a pretty humbling experience. We would have almost certainly had to go to the Superdome stadium when the hotel was evacuated, which was where a large amount of crime happened in the days that followed. The now homeless residents mingled with tourists stuck in the city and things became pretty terrible, it makes you realise how lucky you are.

This post is part of Blogtember, the brainchild of Jenni over at Story of My Life.

Advice to live by

Today's Blogtember topic is simple: Pass on some useful advice or information you learned and always remembered.

During last years dark, dark times my best friend Sasha was my rock, my guide, my collaborator and constant source of inspiration. She saved me from myself and for that I will be forever grateful. During this time she gave me a piece of advice which she tries to live by, and since then I've been doing the same. 

The advice is simple, kill them with kindness.

The basic principle of how Sasha and I use this advice in our everyday lives is that if somebody (usually in the workplace but could be applied to any scenario) really gets your goat, gets under your skin or just generally makes you want to scream at the top of your lungs, the best way to deal with them is to be as nice as possible. I normally find being borderline sickly sweet is pretty effective.

Generally people who are rude, inconsiderate or just plain obnoxious know exactly what they're doing, and if they can see that they're irritating you they will be more likely to continue. If you react in a way that they aren't expecting they won't know what to do and, lets face it, having a cheery disposition is far nicer than walking around under a black cloud.

A life worth living

My friend Sam recently made a somewhat spectacular decision to pack her bags and head to New Zealand for what started as a two week holiday and has now turned into 9 months on the other side of the world, a fresh start and a new adventure, which is still continuing today. 

Reading Sam's blog and seeing the pictures she puts on Facebook have got me thinking about what I want from life, what I value most and mostly, about regrets. 

Will I look back in five years and regret things I didn't do? Chances I didn't take? Opportunities I passed up? Or, will I be content with my lot in life, happy with the choices I've made and be able to look back over the years with few regrets?

Today's Blogtember topic is: if you could take three months off from your life and do anything in the world, what would you do? 

Although making something so drastic possible is somewhat dependent on money, I certainly have a few ideas of what I would do if I could throw caution to the wind.

Firstly I'd pack my bags and jump on a plane to the US of A, starting off in LA then travelling across the country for a month, finishing up in New York City. 

New York is the one city in the world where I would love to live. I'm not sure if it was the years I spent watching Sex and the City and Friends but I feel almost as much at home in NYC as I do in London.

I'd love to be able to spend an extended period of time in the city that never sleeps, exploring even more of the different neighborhoods but money never really allows for me to take a break for longer than a week or so. 

I'd love to rent my own little apartment or plush hotel suite, take my sketchbook, paints and iPad and get creative.

As with most people, achieving a good work-life balance can sometimes be tricky so by the time I've been to work, worked out, made/eaten dinner, done my chores and blogged there's little time much else! I'm determined to start sketching again and buildings are what I love to draw. So what better place to while away three months than travelling around the country that I love, doing my favourite thing, finishing up in the city of my dreams, perfection. 

Well, maybe one day. For now I guess London will have to do and I'll just have to try and make more time for the things I love. And who knows, if I'm sketching and not spending maybe I'll be able to afford that trip to America.

This post is part of Blogtember, the brainchild of Jenni over at Story of My Life.

Hampshire is my home

This month I've embarked on a new challenge.

Having stumbled upon Blogtember through my friend Mimi, I've decided to give it a go and aim to blog every day in September, with the exception of weekends.  

Today's topic is: Describe where or what you come from. The people/ the places, and/ or the factors that make up who you are.

Although I live in London now, if you read this blog regularly you'll know that I often return home to visit my family and the area where I spent most of my life.

Hampshire, or more specifically Titchfield Village and the Warsash, Locks Heath and Park Gate areas, will always hold a special place in my heart. It's where I went to school, met my friends, learned to love, had my heart broken, had to grow up and started on the road to London. 

I lived with my Mum and Dad in our family home in Hampshire for around twenty years before I headed for the big smoke and even today, three years later, I still sometimes find myself feeling homesick. I head home for the weekend about once every six weeks and as soon as I see the sun set over Portsmouth on a Friday evening I immediately feel comfortable: I'm home. 

It doesn't matter what we end up doing: a trip to the local pub, afternoon tea with Mother, a trip to M&S with Dad, goofing around with Mark, a walk along the beach or simply a night in front of the telly, I love spending time with my parents and my brother, and I don't care who knows it.

These are my people, and they've helped make me the person that I am today.

 This post is part of Blogtember, the brainchild of Jenni over at Story of My Life.

A week off with my boy: a river walk to Richmond

Every now and then there comes a time when you really, really, need a week off work. A chance to recharge your batteries, get some clarity and spend some time with your nearest and dearest, and last week in the L&F household was just that.

The Boy and I booked the four days following the bank holiday weekend off work and decided to use the opportunity to spend some time in our city, doing all the things we don't do at the weekends because it's always too busy with tourists and Londoners alike.

We started the week with a long walk. 

Training for the half marathon is well under way and although I hadn't planned in any long runs I figured walking as much as we could each day was as good a training as any. So we woke up nice and early and set off along the river to Richmond. 

I particularly love the patch between Hammersmith and Chiswick, the houses are gorgeous, with views of the river and they make me dream of winning the lottery even more so than usual. The Boy and I often take a walk here at the weekend, it's especially pretty at Christmas time when the households decorate their doors with elaborate wreaths and mistletoe.

The walk is about five miles but is so pretty the distance seems to fly by as you go past so many beautiful sights.

The reason for coming to Richmond, aside from sightseeing, was that I wanted to take The Boy to Pig's Ears, a beer cellar, bar and restaurant stocking over 100 different beers from around the world.

We stopped for lunch, the triple pig burger for me (screw the diet, I'm on holiday), while The Boy went for sausage and mash. Both were delicious - we'll definitely be back to sample some more food (and beers) on our next trip down river.

We met up with our friend Andy and walked back towards Kew, where The Boy and I whiled away what was left of the afternoon exploring Kew Gardens in the sunshine.

The day was wonderful, although pretty exhausting and I collapsed into bed pleased with the 12 miles or so we'd walked over the course of the day. It was a great start to the week.

 To find out more about visiting Kew Gardens visit their website, here.